What If Your Emotions Aren’t the Problem?
The Cost of Looking Strong
From a young age, many of us were taught to suppress our difficult emotions. Sadness? Weak. Fear? Irrational. Anger? Unacceptable. So what did we learn to do? Hide it. Push it down. Stay in control. Look strong.
The problem is… that doesn’t make the feelings disappear.
They just go underground—festering, leaking out in sideways behaviours, or turning in on ourselves as low self-esteem, anxiety, or depression.
What’s Actually Going On?
You might say things like, “I’m not good enough,” “I’m too emotional,” or “I should be stronger.” But those thoughts aren’t truth—they’re patterns. Defence strategies. Survival mechanisms built to protect you when you were younger and didn’t have the tools or support to process your emotions.
Now, as an adult, they keep you stuck.
Underneath all the shame, self-criticism and fear is something simple: a feeling that needs to be felt.
Vulnerability Isn’t Weakness
Vulnerability gets a bad rap. But the truth is, it’s not about falling apart. It’s about being real.
When we start to honour our difficult emotions—when we stop judging ourselves for feeling sad, angry, lost, or scared—something shifts. That emotional energy, once trapped, starts to move. And you start to feel lighter, stronger, more you.
It’s not about fixing yourself. It’s about coming home to yourself.
A New Way Forward
Therapy isn’t about endlessly digging through the past. It’s about learning to meet yourself with compassion, curiosity, and courage. It’s about noticing the beliefs you’ve carried—I’m not enough, I don’t matter, I’m too much—and realising: you don’t have to live like that anymore.
When we create a space where your emotions are welcome, where vulnerability is safe, and where your story is held with care—you change.
Not into someone new. But into more of who you already are.
Ready to feel different?
We’re here to help.
Start your journey today.
Kirsten Dahlerup – The Therapy Lounge